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Details
Condition: New
Format: Paperback
ISBN: 9780340943755
Publisher: Hodder & Stoughton
Overview
Mating in Captivity is Esther Perel's landmark exploration of desire within long-term relationships. Drawing on decades as a couples therapist, Perel asks why security and passion so often pull against each other, and what couples can do to keep eroticism alive once domestic routine sets in. Blending clinical case studies with sharp, accessible prose, this paperback is a thought-provoking read for anyone in a committed relationship, and a staple recommendation for therapists and relationship counsellors alike.
About the Book
Modern relationships promise everything: lifelong companionship, deep intimacy, and lasting erotic connection. Esther Perel argues that these goals can quietly work against one another, since the very closeness and predictability that make us feel safe can also be what dampens desire. In Mating in Captivity, she draws on more than three decades of clinical practice with couples from around the world to examine why so many people struggle to want what they already have.
Rather than offering simplistic fixes, Perel builds a nuanced framework around the tension between "security" and "adventure" — the domestic and the erotic. She uses real (anonymised) case studies to illustrate common patterns: the parent who can't switch from caregiver to lover, the partner who confuses closeness with merging, the couple who mistake conflict-avoidance for intimacy. Throughout, her voice is warm, witty, and refreshingly free of jargon, making complex psychological ideas feel immediately relevant to everyday life.
This edition, published by Hodder & Stoughton, runs to 272 pages and has become one of the most widely recommended relationship books of the last two decades, translated into multiple languages and referenced constantly in therapy rooms, book clubs, and podcasts. It sits alongside Perel's later work, including The State of Affairs, as essential reading for anyone curious about the psychology of modern love.
About the Author
Esther Perel is a Belgian psychotherapist based in New York, renowned worldwide for her work on relationships, desire, and infidelity. She is the host of the acclaimed podcast Where Should We Begin?, and her TED Talks on desire and infidelity have been viewed by millions. Perel's international therapy practice and decades of clinical experience inform her writing, which has made her one of the most recognised voices in contemporary relationship psychology.
Why You'll Love This Book
Honest, funny, and genuinely useful, Mating in Captivity reframes familiar relationship frustrations with fresh language and real hope. It's the rare relationship book that couples actually want to discuss together.
Please Note: Cover may vary slightly; this is the UK edition matching the ISBN shown.
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